Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.
- Milton Berle.
Running
Someone told me that when they go to Vermont, they feel like they're home. I'm that way at Saks.
- Caroline Rhea.
Tooltip
It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.
- Stephen Leacock.
Heart
There's nothing wrong with being shallow as long as you're insightful about it.
- Dennis Miller.
Instagram
I'm thankful for the
three ounce Ziploc bag,
so that I have somewhere to put my savings.
- Paula Poundstone.
Heart
The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own hand.
- Fred Allen.
Train Tracks
Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.
- Milton Berle.
Heart
The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them.
-Bill Vaughan.
White Twitter
Don't talk about yourself; it will be done when you leave.
-Wilson Mizner.
Heart
A promising young man should go into politics so that he can go on promising for the rest of his life.
-Robert Byrne.
Burst
I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.
- Rita Rudner.
Cast Iron Pan